Divorce Doesn’t Have To Be Hard | LEAP Podcast

by | Jun 23, 2022 | Podcast

There are a lot of options to get divorced. Collaborative divorce is one option that can keep your divorce civil, safe, honest, and transparent. If you don’t want your divorce to be hard, a collaborative divorce can be a fantastic alternative to the typical court battle that is portrayed in the media. Hiring a mediator is another great option to make a divorce less hard. A mediator can help to facilitate resolutions to the hard parts of a divorce. When does divorce become hard? We find that divorce becomes difficult when one or both spouses take a very stubborn approach to the situation. For example, if one spouse digs in their heels and insists they keep the house otherwise they’ll take it to court, that makes it difficult to proceed with amicable solutions. At Leapfrog Divorce, we pride ourselves on helping people through difficult times. Divorce is difficult but it doesn’t have to be hard. Give us a call to discuss your options.    

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Show Transcript

You know, one of the questions I get a lot from people is, what are the options for getting a divorce in Florida? And what does it look like? Hi, everybody. I’m A.J. Grossman, I’m a divorce lawyer, Florida Supreme Court certified family mediator, and dispute resolution specialist with Leap Frog Divorce.

You know, marriage is hard, and divorce is hard. But divorce doesn’t have to be hard. There are a lot of options in Florida, that many people don’t know about. And I’m a big fan of one option in particular for people, particularly people with children. But it’s not exclusive to people with children. And that’s called collaborative divorce. It’s a wonderful alternative for people who don’t want to air their dirty laundry in a courtroom or have to appear before a judge. They value the opportunity to communicate and talk in a safe environment with a team of professional people.

And so when I say a team of professional people, people who choose a collaborative divorce, often have a financial neutral professional, to help gather all of their financial information, help them understand what their financial picture looks for, looks like, and help them come up with options to help them accomplish their financial goals, through their divorce. And after their divorce. They also have what’s called a mental health professional. And that person is also a neutral professional, who really is kind of the conductor of the ship of divorce if you will. They’re the Communication Coach or communication facilitator. And so they help us with an agenda for our meetings when we all get together. They help us stay on track, if we get off track, they help people express feelings and thoughts that might be difficult. And oftentimes, they are children experts. And so for those couples who have minor children who need a parenting plan in Florida detailing their visitation and custody agreement. That mental health-neutral professional can work with each one of the parents individually and the parents together to help come up with a great plan to co-parent together after the divorce, it will really be in the best interest of the kids. And so it’s a great process.

You know, I started off talking about marriage is hard. Divorce is hard. But divorce doesn’t have to be hard. And that’s a great process. I would not call it hard at all. Is it easy? Not always. Can it be extremely difficult? It can. Oftentimes I would say on average, it’s really not hard. The most difficult part I would say is to be able to sit in the same room with your spouse and talk about some difficult conversations. Another alternative is hiring a mediator, you might decide that instead of hiring lawyers, you want to work with a mediator who will help you talk about the issues in your marriage, the issues that need to be resolved during a divorce, and help you communicate in a way that facilitates resolution or settlement to those issues. And so it can be a great process. I do that for a lot of people. And it doesn’t have to be hard.

I find that when divorce is quote-unquote, hard. It’s when people take very stubborn positions on things. For example, one spouse might say, I want the house, no ifs, ands, or buts I’m getting the house. And if you won’t give it to me, then we’ll just go to trial in front of the judge. And I’ll get to tell my story in court and the judge will give me the house and you’re going to spend a whole lot of money for lawyers and I’m going to get the house anyway. It’s that kind of position-taking, if you will, that can make divorce very hard.

Another example is two people will have a child together, either while they’re married or before they’re married, and spend, you know, let’s say 10 years in a marriage, and then go through a divorce and then all of a sudden one spouse thinks that the other parent is just completely inept that you know they couldn’t find their way out of a paper bag when it comes to parenting small children, and they take the position that that parent should not be involved with their child’s life at all. They don’t want them making any decisions about education or health care. They don’t want them making any decisions about what they should watch on TV, what their diet should be, or what kind of things they should do for fun. And that’s when divorce becomes very hard.

And so in working with my clients, I always try and provide as much information for them to consider as possible. And one of those things is asking them questions like, you know, what’s the worst thing that can happen if your spouse continues to be an involved loving parent in your child’s life? You know, those are things that often people don’t think about when they’re going through a divorce. You know, their emotions are running high, and they feel like they have to fight and dig in in a firm position. And really, you don’t have to, and again, those are just some examples of what can make divorce hard, but it really doesn’t have to be.

So thank you for listening. I hope this video was helpful. If you enjoyed it, please like the video please consider subscribing to my channel. I’m releasing new videos all the time. Again, I’m A.J. Grossman, a divorce lawyer with Leap Frog Divorce, have a wonderful day and be well.

Arthur J. Grossman J.D., LL.M., Esq

Arthur J. Grossman J.D., LL.M., Esq

AJ Grossman graduated at the top of his Florida law school class, has been trained in Collaborative Divorce, has a Master of Laws degree in Dispute Resolution, and is a Barrister member of the invite-only Central Florida Family Law Inn of Court. His aggressive advocacy on behalf of his clients provides hope and reassurance throughout challenging divorces.


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